Open letter to guest next door

Dear Smoker

I personally have no objection to you smoking which may or may not contribute to your early demise. The fact that you will very likely need treatment for smoking related illnesses in the future only rankles a little bit as my taxes contribute to the NHS (National Health Service) that will be forced to treat you.

What I do very strongly object to is the fact that you throw your cigarette butt out of the bedroom window and into my garden or onto my kitchen roof. Why do you do this when smoking is not permitted in the guest house? I understand notices are in the bedrooms to advise guests of this! Maybe it is ignorance and you can't read but that is easily remedied as the local college does offer adult reading classes. I noticed that the bedroom window was wide open so I see you like fresh air even on a chilly morning~ silly me you weren't just hoping to get rid of the smell were you!!

You must have seen that there is a seating area outside the guest house. That is not to admire the view but to facilitate (that means make it easier in case you don't know) smokers. In future please do me the courtesy of using it.

Sadly you are not the first guest who has behaved in this manner, however I would like think you might be the last to cause me the inconvenience of clearing up behind you.

thank you

PS yes just in case you are wondering I do have evidence and I will be telling the proprietor.

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October 25th 2006: Cape Cod