Witty Wednesday # 71 Love Story, Marriage Guidance, Erectrician

My friend Daffy provided me with all of today's material. Thank you Daffy.

The love story of Ralph and Edna.

Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool. Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.

Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out.

When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.

When she went to tell Edna the news she said, 'Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love. I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness.
The bad news is, Ralph hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead.'

Edna replied, 'He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?'

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Marriage Guidance

Jackie and her husband Mark went for marriage guidance after 25 years of marriage.

Jackie complained of neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable.

After listening for some time the therapist got up walked round his desk and after asking Jackie to stand up, took her in a forceful embrace and kissed her passionately as her bemused husband watched on.

Jackie sat down in a trance and the therapist returned to his chair

"This is what your wife needs 3 times a week can you do it?".

Mark thought for a minute then replied "Well, I can drop her off on Mondays and Wednesdays but I play golf on Fridays".

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'If the light stays on for more than 4 hours, call your "erectrician.'

Hope I've managed to make you smile. I know most of America will be smiling today because they have a new President!



Archives:
2007: Holiday Traditions

2006: Beautiful Sunset for Guy Fawkes Night