Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Witty Wednesday # 56 Headlines


John sent me the best headlines of last year......

YEAR'S BEST [actual] HEADLINES OF 2007:

Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
[Imagine that!]

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
[No, really?]

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
[Now that's taking things a bit far!]

Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
[Not if I wipe thoroughly!]

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
[What a guy! Bravo!]

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
[Good-for-nothin' lazy louts!]

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
[See if that works any better than a fair trial!]

War Dims Hope for Peace
[I can see how it might have that effect!]

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
[says Dubya Bush!]

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
[Who would have thought!]

Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
[They may be on to something!]

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
[You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?]


Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
[He probably IS the battery charge!]

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
[Weren't they fat enough?!]

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
[Taste like chicken?]

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
[Boy, are they tall!]

And the winner is....

Typhoon Rips Through
Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

I'm making it short today folks, I really must clean my house...what a fun day I'm going to have. If I get enough done I will go swimming this afternoon!!!

Archives:
2007: Fun Monday #25

Labels: ,

11 Comments:

At 16/7/08 13:11, Blogger Molly said...

Hilarious Chris, your side comments are as funny as the headlines. They are all so funny...he,he.

 
At 16/7/08 15:38, Blogger MAYBELLINE said...

Love it! My day is starting with a smile.

 
At 16/7/08 16:23, Anonymous swampy said...

OK, I'll have to come back to read and enjoy all of these...packing for the trip right now.

 
At 16/7/08 16:29, Blogger storyteller said...

Oh my gosh you find the funniest things! I’m ROFL (something I try to avoid since it’s harder to get up these dayz). Your comments are classic too! Thanks for making my morning ;--)
Hugs and blessings,

 
At 16/7/08 17:07, Blogger john.g. said...

Very well done Chris! xx

 
At 16/7/08 18:08, Blogger ChrisB said...

Just to clarify. I cannot take credit for the side comments it was all part of the package from John!

 
At 17/7/08 03:48, Blogger lisaschaos said...

CLeaning house is no fun but those headlines are super!

 
At 17/7/08 04:17, Anonymous dawn said...

Those are so funny. Sirdar and I had a really good laugh over those.

 
At 17/7/08 09:08, Blogger ChrisB said...

lisa marie don't tell anyone but I didn't do as much cleaning as I planned! I sort of got side tracked!!

hi dawn thanks for dropping by glad you had a laugh.

 
At 17/7/08 13:16, OpenID marmiteandtea said...

Hee-hee they are good.

 
At 19/7/08 23:50, Blogger Eve said...

very funny, That started my day off with a smile. The police runing down jaywalkers and shooting defendants may work, who knows. Sure it's extreme but it may work.....

 

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