Monday, July 23, 2007

Fun Monday# 26

Willowtree is our host this week and he asked us:

"Tell us about your best friend. Particularly things like: where you first met, how long you've been friends and why you think you are best friends"


"Who is the TV character that most makes you want to put your foot through the screen (it must be a character, not a person in reality TV). And why."

When I first read this I thought I don't think I can play this week because I don't really have a best friend.
I could, however, just write one sentance and say I have always felt that my daughters are my best friends as they are the ones who love me no matter what but I didn't think I could get away with that!!

Anyway it got me thinking!! How do you define a 'best' friend. For me it's a confidente, someone with whom you can share your innermost thoughts, someone who will laugh and cry with you and be there in your hour of need. You feel comfortable with them and you know they won't judge you because your house is untidy and your life is a mess. If you call a friend just as (s)he are settling down to a favourite TV programme they turn if off to listen rather than say I'll call you back (days later!). A friend may have traits that you don't like and they may enjoy different interests but you can speak your mind, disagree and debate on issues without fear of being judged and found wanting. A true friend is someone you may not see for a long time but when you meet it's like you only met yesterday.
At different stages in my life I have enjoyed some very good friendships. I am still in contact with several (but now only at Christmas when we catch up on the past year). I have one friend I met back in the early 50's at Junior school. I have many stories I could tell from our teenage years (hmm I might tell sometime!), oh and I was her bridesmaid which was a great thrill.

Another friend I met the day I started at Secondary School (aged 11) remained a close friend until she moved away when our children were toddlers but I'm still in touch with her, more recently we have started emailing which is lovely.
When I was a nursing student seven of us became good friends. Six of us eventually shared a flat and the other person lived at home which was only over the road so she spent a lot of time at or flat. We all went our separate ways after completing our training but I still kept in touch mainly through my one friend. She made her home in South Africa and is Godmother to Sam. A few years ago we (all 7 of us) had a reunion and it was just like turning the clock back.

When my first marriage failed, not long after we had moved house, I was surprised that it was two new friends (who moved to the area not long after me) who supported me and listened to me feeling sorry for myself and helping with the girls (between us we had 7 girls). It was a very sad time for us when these friends moved to different parts of the country. I will be forever grateful to them for all their love and friendship, sadly one of them lost her daughter in a riding accident a few years later.

All through my working life I didn't really have time to forge, what I would call a 'best' friendship, life was too hectic caring for the family and any spare time was spent playing tennis which was my big passion. During this time my dog Tamsie was my best friend, she loved going to the Tennis club with me. She was always there welcoming me home, comforting me if I was sad, slinking away when I was cross with her but really delighted when I forgave her. So I think I will leave you with a photo of Tamsie reclining in the dining room. I should just add Tamsie is no longer with us but I still miss her even after 14 years.

I don't think this is quite what Willowtree had in mind but heho it's the best I could do! I'm now off to visit everyone else.

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At 23/7/07 13:18, Blogger Asha said...

Daughters ARE the best friends who will be loyal to you and love unconditionally forever unlike others who come and go!
Tamsie looks so beautiful there Chris.

At 23/7/07 13:22, Blogger Beccy said...

Great post mum, I was going to suggest your daughters but decided to let you come up with your own ideas.

Funnily enough if I had had time to write a post I would have written about Maxine as my first best friend (and how she broke my heart)!

At 23/7/07 14:08, Blogger Debs said...

My kids are my best friends. Without a word, they know how I feel.

Tamsie looks so relaxed in the pic, I miss my dogs too.

Beautiful post.

At 23/7/07 14:12, Blogger elena jane said...

what a fantastic post about friends. i think there are all sorts of friends, some like daughters who are there always, and some who just come in for a short time to help us and then aren't as present due to moving or whatever.

At 23/7/07 14:55, Blogger mjd said...

I have enjoyed reading about the friendships throughout your life. We, in the blogging world, do know about your lovely daughters. It is nice to read about your other friends too.

At 23/7/07 15:31, Anonymous Arkansas Songbird said...

Very nicely put!!

At 23/7/07 15:51, Blogger Beckie said...

Lovely post and I think it is fitting for Fun Monday. Have a great day!

At 23/7/07 16:13, Blogger Jodi said...

What a great "Fun Monday" Friendship post!! Tamsie was beautiful!!

At 23/7/07 16:31, Blogger ChrisB said...

asha I have been blessed with wonderful daughters and Tamsie was very much my baby.

beccy in hindsight it was probably a good thing they moved when they did- I know you didn't feel this at the time!

debs I know exactly what you mean!

elena jane don't they say we only make a handful of true friends in our lifetime- I think this is probably true.

mjd- am I bit OTT about my daughters and grandchildren?!?!

arkansas songbird- thank you

beckie thanks but it is actually not a great monday here we are having so much rain and there is a lot of flooding in much of the UK.

jodi Tamsie was a softy but she was an excellent guard dog as well.

At 23/7/07 17:19, Blogger Kaytabug said...

Thank you for your comment! Each day gets a lil' better.
Your post was wonderful. What makes a best friend was spot on! It sounds like you do have a few constants, lifelong. I am a firm believer that we are given friends when we need them, that they may be there only to get us through something or to teach us something and then are gone. But there are those that are lifetime friends... You have been blessed!

At 23/7/07 19:00, Anonymous Joy T. said...

Your 'what makes a best friend' is exactly how I feel. I haven't found it in someone for awhile now, but it may happen again some day. As for Tamsie, she was a gorgeous dog. Dogs can truly be mans...or friend.

At 23/7/07 19:25, Blogger Robocop said...

Tamsie was a cute dog. I remember every dog that I ever had, and in a way, they have all been my best friends. I hope to meet them again in the next life, and hope I'll have a yard to accommodate them all.

At 23/7/07 19:48, Anonymous susan said...

You are spot on as to what a best friend should be. I can see my girls being best friends with me once they get over this horrible hormonal stage! :)

At 23/7/07 20:21, Anonymous wolfbaby said...

we did something very similar though you were more wordy then me.. i was feelin kinda lazy... ;)

At 23/7/07 20:21, Blogger JennieBoo said...

Best friends are so wonderful, no matter WHO they might be!

Tamsie was a sweetheart. I'm so glad Tasmie was able to be part of your life.

Thank you for sharing!

Happy Monday

At 23/7/07 22:38, Blogger Barbara said...

I've never been best friends with my mother. I envy the relationship you have with Beccy and Sam. I have a wonderful relationship with my AFS host daughter from France who lived with us for 12 months. She is like a daughter. I do look forward to daughters in law someday.

At 24/7/07 00:39, Blogger willowtree said...

Close enough. Tamsie looks like a Border Collie, but her head seems little too square. But that may just be camera angle, in any even she was a great looking dog.

At 24/7/07 03:33, Anonymous gawilli said...

I would like to hear some stories from your teenage years!

By the way, Tamsie was beautiful. Her markings are a lot like my Cali.

At 24/7/07 03:50, Blogger Raven_Dase said...

this is the sweetest post that I have read so far. I think its wonderful to include your fur baby as your best friend! She is very pretty!!

At 24/7/07 04:43, Blogger Pamela said...

It was perfect... you said you didn't have a best friends.. but the post was full of them.

At 24/7/07 06:29, Anonymous dawn said...

What a wonderful tribute to best friends. I think that at any moment, someone can be considered a best friend. That is the person who is there when you need him or her the most and they fulfil that need. What a beautiful dog Tamsie was.
Thanks for visiting my Fun Monday.

At 24/7/07 08:29, Blogger ChrisB said...

katabug I think you are right spot on with your comment!

joy t I hope you find someone who fits the bill :)

wolfbaby I think quite a few us wrote in a very similar vein.

susan LOL I can tell you that stage lasts a loooong time :)

robocop dogs make such special friends!

jenniboo I have been blessed and for this I am thankful :)

Barbara I think your future DIL's will be very lucky to have you as a friend :)

WT Tamsie was a bordercollie/labrador cross, so she was much broader than you would expect.

gawilli I might just do that one day!!

raven_dase oh that was so sweet of you thank you :)

pamela my girls will always be top of the list :)

dawn I think that what you said is so true :)

At 24/7/07 14:15, Blogger irreverentmama said...

My eldest daughter (almost 22) has just this year entered into the rank of 'friend'. We were very close when she was young, had a rough three years in her teens, but recently, she's all I could want in a daughter and, increasingly, in a friend.

In fact, I suspect it's my younger daughter I'll be true friends with, when she's a little older. Her character is so comfortable to me.

At 24/7/07 14:22, Blogger ChrisB said...

irreverentmama I suppose if I'm honest I see more of my younger daughter (Beccy Dublin) and we therefore get to do more together, other daughter (Sam has lived in San Fransisco for past 6 yrs) I say hoorah for blogging and skype as I feel very much part of their lives!!

At 24/7/07 16:01, Blogger Karina said...

Well, I think this post was exactly what this Fun Monday was to be about...what a beautiful tribute to your friends throughout your life!

At 24/7/07 16:57, Blogger ChrisB said...

karina I think everyone has made me realise I have enjoyed some special friendships along the way :)

At 24/7/07 17:06, Anonymous Lisa said...

Wonderful post, Chris!
Beautiful sentiments, especially about Tamsie.

At 24/7/07 18:19, Blogger The Artist formerly Known as Purpleworms (!) said...

What a bautiful post - I couldn't have siad it any better - I identify SO with what you have said (I have no daughters - but I feel that way about my Mom) and I really connect to the way you were able to describe the people that come and go but have strong permanent connections to us somehow. I love what you said about Tamsie and I also thought about a favorite dog from my past who is now long gone. I miss him terribly!

At 24/7/07 18:49, Blogger ChrisB said...

Thanks Wendy, I often find reading what other people write triggers memories. Also I often find that someone says exactly what I have in mind but they say it so much more eloquently than I ever could.

At 24/7/07 19:32, Blogger Rachel said...

Great post!! Maybe not "typical", but great nonetheless!

At 24/7/07 22:27, Blogger ChrisB said...

rachel thanks for dropping by.

At 25/7/07 02:25, Blogger willowtree said...

Ah ha! That would certainly explain the squarer head.

At 25/7/07 03:03, Blogger Emma in Canada said...

Chris, I feel much the same way about how you described a best friend. I am lucky enough to have those qualities in one of my friends. Great post, and the dog was gorgeous!

At 25/7/07 05:32, Blogger The Artist formerly Known as Purpleworms (!) said...

Thanks for your visit. I must have asecret connection to the Beatles - my friends were actually genuine close friends - George was my first boyfriend (He died of bone cancer). Linda was my best friend in Minnesota (Colon cancer got her) and John was a good friend and lawyer with whom I worked when I was in Graduate School. I did have a boyfriend named Paul who is alive and well as far as I know and I know know Ringo(e)s at all.

At 25/7/07 07:46, Blogger ChrisB said...

wendy sorry I got it wrong that was very crass assumption on my part.

emma then you have a true friend there :)


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